I have been learning a lot about what it really means to be a missionary as it comes to the last couple weeks of my training and ya know what I have realized more than anything? I have a LOT of weaknesses. I have a LOT of things to learn and I am never going to be able to learn it all. We are constantly learning new things and finding ways in which we can improve but we always seem to fall short. But ya know what? We don't have to know everything! We don't have to be perfect! In the hands of the Lord, it is the most humble and submissive servant that is the most effective tool in the hands of the Lord! When I think of prophets like Joseph Smith or other prophets in the Book of Mormon and Bible who do not have gifts for speaking or writing and then read the things that they wrote or the things that they spoke unto the people in this time, it is hard to believe that they even had weaknesses! It is hard to think of them as humans! But they all had weaknesses that made them humble and submissive to the will of God. I have always thought that these weaknesses that these prophets had were just for us to believe more easily that they were prophets because it is obvious that they must have had the help of God to do such great thing, but I have come to realize that it is not just that! Their weaknesses are what make them humble. Their weaknesses are what make them strong. In Helaman chapter 12, it talks about how we, as human beings, are nothing. We are even less than the sands of the earth. I was always a little depressed by this thought. But upon studying this a little more this morning in my studies, I realized in the verses that followed, it was saying that we are less when we are not submissive to the will of God! The sands of the earth are greater than we because when God commands the sand to move, it moves! Now imagine how great WE could be! We are a lot more than just sand and if we could let the Lord guide us in the things that he would have us do, just imagine how great we could be!
I am feeling super nervous right now because in about a week and a half I will be ending my training, getting a new companion, and I will be thrown into the real world of missionary work without my mom (that's what they call our trainers here :)! So I've been pretty nervous because I know that I have so many weaknesses and still have sooo much to learn but this thought that really if we give our will up to God and humble ourselves in his hands, we can be GREAT! So I thank God for the weaknesses that he has blessed me with in order to help me to be humble :) Tell Brother Chronis that now I understand what it means to Stay Bleu and I am working on that every day!!
I love you so much and thank you for all of the emails!! I LOVE hearing about everything that's going on over there!
No pictures this week... sorry! Next week!
--Hermana Harvey